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There is nothing more gratifying than hearing how your book helped change someone’s life for the better. There’s a very specific chapter in The Myth of the Nice Girl that continues to deliver on that: Negotiate with Strategy and Empathy. My latest column in Refinery29 focuses on this one topic and how four real women asked for more (and succeeded!). Here’s your cheat sheet:
  1. Know Your Worth: What do you bring to the table? You’ll build confidence by determining your market value and having data to back that up.
  2. Focus on the Mutual Benefits: The best deals are made when everyone feels like they have won. What does the company stand to gain from retaining you?
  3. Time it Right: That could mean asking after a big company win, or knowing that your boss will be most receptive at the beginning of the day.
  4. Own Your Value. It can be nerve-wracking to negotiate. You’re not alone and you’re not crazy or greedy or pushy to ask for a better salary. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no.
I believe gender equality in the workforce begins with women asking for what they rightfully deserve—in this case, more pay. I hope you’re inspired by these women’s success stories. Now it’s your turn to do your homework and ask for more!

TIP / Make Time to Connect IRL

Left to our own devices (pun intended), we are not connecting—with our colleagues, our customers, and even ourselves, Erica Keswin writes in her new book, Bring Your Human to Work. Bringing your human to work is about being intentional about our relationships. When we connect, our oxytocin (feel good hormone) goes up and our cortisol (stress hormones) goes down. Investing in relationships is good for you, great for your business, and just might change the world.

Win it: The first three people to respond to this email will get a free copy of Erica’s new book!

My Startup Life

The dynamic duo at Wolf + Friends just released an important app for moms raising children with special needs. It’s designed to connect women and deliver important content from occupational therapists, child psychologists, and other experts. I’m not seeing much innovation in the media and tech space when it comes to serving families with special needs and love that Gena and Carissa have figured out how to use technology to help women build a thriving community.

What I'm Passionate About

This month, I want to give a big shout out to Girl be Heard. The organization runs afterschool and weekend theater programs in underserved areas of New York City to develop and celebrate the voices of young women. I believe in this mission so strongly, as do Lin-Manuel Miranda and Gloria Steinem, my fellow advisors. If you want to join me and support this amazing cause, you can:

If you have a cause you're passionate about, email me about it! I may feature it here. 

On My Radar

  • The What Summit is happening this week on October 5 in San Francisco! I first met founders Amy and Gina when I worked at Time Inc. and I love the community of powerhouse women that they’re building.
  • Other events to add to your calendar: Pennsylvania Conference for Women (Philadelphia) on October 12; Move the Dial Global Summit (Toronto) on November 7; Massachusetts Conference for Women (Boston) on December 6.
  • Take a listen: In the Foster Your Passion podcast, I talk about the book-writing process and how I had to get vulnerable to make the book relatable.
  • I shared my story for #SorryImNotSorry week at Her Campus.
  • If you want to broaden your village, check out HEYMAMA, a killer community of working moms. Apply and use this code to get $50 off: fransfriend
And, if you have a friend who would love to join our newsletter circle, tell them to sign up here. If you want a sample of my book, take a listen. And, as always, email me with ideas.
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