Tapping inner resources using the Nurtured Heart Approach®
I believe each of us has unique inner gifts to share with the world. I want to:
  • inspire leaders, parents, caregivers and educators
  • celebrate inner resources, and
  • share the journey of learning and living the Nurtured Heart Approach®.
In this newsletter I call on the work of Hilary Jacobs Hendel, author of It's Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to Your Authentic Self.

My newsletter nuggets and resources are intended to be useful to any NHA practitioner. This is NOT a substitute for NHA training. Subscribe now!
The Change Triangle ®

Many of us have been cultured to subdue our emotions often apologizing for our very essence. By attending to and acknowledging our feelings we can develop our emotional intelligence (EQ). In turn, a strong EQ supports our work with NHA which encourages us to celebrate intensity and learn to use it well.

According to Jacobs Hendel, “Our feelings are a compass for living. Ignoring emotions leads to stress, anxiety and difficulty finding joy and peace.” We need to feel our core emotions: fear, anger, grief, joy, disgust and excitement. While the inhibitory emotions of shame, anxiety and guilt protect us from emotional overwhelm, they often get in the way of core emotions. Similarly, defenses including humor, self harm, numbing and an array of other avoidance strategies block us from processing our feelings.

Cultivate the Seven C's

Hilary Jacob Hendel states, “In allowing ourselves to fully experience core emotions, we move toward an openhearted state where we are calm, curious, connected, compassionate, confident, courageous, and clear.” It seems, honoring feelings is the ultimate act of self-care that avails us to give to others. Below I offer a handful of ideas on cultivating the 7 C’s and celebrating greatness.

  • Attend to your breath and explore other aspects of meditation.
  • Welcome feelings as friends or tour guides on the journey of life.
  • Educators and Healthcare Providers check out the Calm App and register for a free subscription!

  • Touch, call, text, email, send a card...reach out and connect with someone to share your appreciation.
  • Make eye contact and exchange greetings with strangers.
  • Smile and breathe in your greatness. Keep your tank full so that you may share with others.

  • Practice self-compassion, understanding, acceptance and forgiveness.
  • Have fun with your Stand 2 by remembering in any moment there is always something going right.
  • Notice judgment and turn it into a question. "What happened that contributed to that?"

  • What and how questions are open-ended and least likely to provoke threat. Why questions often prompt a defensive response.
  • To combine connection, curiosity and creativity, take turns coming up with as many How and What questions as you can about an object in 1-2 minutes.

  • Often when negative emotions are triggered, we're looking for a way to get back on track. Creative recognitions offer the perfect way to make a simple and doable (no fail) request that sets the stage to follow up with immediate positivity.
  • When we are dysregulated, our brains struggle to access imagination needed to reframe a situation. Give yourself time.

  • Listen for clarity from others with respectful appreciation for their ability to set boundaries.
  • Use moments of chaos as gentle reminders to bolster your clarity.
  • Find a way to carve out time for yourself, then be clear with others as you gift yourself this time.

  • Celebrate successes and use recognitions on yourself when you feel your feelings.
  • Notice your progress with the 3 Stands of the NHA.
  • We all have different needs in times of stress or dysregulation. Use your time while offering the "gift of reset" as a chance to normalize the process of getting back into the game.
Call to Action
Let me know if you want a 30-day trial of the Calm App.

Check out this article about supporting children as they cope with fear of failure (includes free printables from Big Life Journal)

Learn more about Hilary Jacobs Hendel

August 6-7, 2019
Two-day NHA Extravaganza 

Day 1: NHA Introduction - Refresh
Day 2: Kicking Off the School Year with NHA

Tentative location: Goodman Community Center, Madison, WI

Tammy Holtan Arnol and I are teaming up to offer a full and fun opportunity to immerse yourself in NHA. Details on cost and registration coming soon!
Click Here to Express Interest
The Nurtured Heart Approach is copyrighted material belonging to Howard Glasser and the Children's Success Foundation.
As stated above, the material in this newsletter is not a substitute for NHA training.
Copyright © Paula Wick, PhD. 2019 SHINE FROM WITHIN CONSULTING, All rights reserved.

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