A tale I wrote
5 ATTEMPTS AT WRITING A HAPPY POEM
All of the humans died.
But because all of them died,
there was no one around to be sad.
Which was nice.
Jilly woke up approximately
24 hours late for her Friday morning meeting,
It was SATURDAAAAAAAAAAY!
She was, of course,
called up and fired,
A lie in on MONDAAAAAAAAAAY!
A kitten was born
that could speak English.
It was amazing!
It went door-to-door reassuring cat owners
that independence is a search
for freedom from control,
not freedom from love.
Cadbury invented healthy chocolate
that tasted exactly like chocolate
and made you skinnier and prettier.
But people didn’t bow to the pressure
to be “perfect” and bought more
happy fat bars.
After nine hundred and thirty million
five hundred and thirty four thousand
seven hundred and sixty two listens,
Pharrell Williams was still pretty happy.